October 8, 2005:

I know most of you don’t come here for the words as much as the pictures, so I’ll get right to that. But there’s some commentary wrapping up Bennett’s first month below the pics. 

Click on any picture to see the bigger view - and then use the arrows on that page to flip through the pictures one by one.

David here.  Time for another update.  OK - past due for another update, but everyone knows the second kid is different than the first.  At this point with Carter we were amazed at his ability to track objects. With Bennett we know this is normal and have a clue of how quickly he’ll develop.  He’s still beautiful and loved - just not as unique an addition to the household that Carter was.  Bennett will no doubt benefit from this in some way - maybe he’ll be more self-confident because we don’t rush to him with every odd sound like we probably did with Carter.  And here is where the comparison ends, if I can help it. We don’t compare the 2 of them - just our reactions to the 2 of them. 

The last few weeks have seen us settling in to more of a routine.  Carter and I are going to swim class 2 times a week.  We’re trying to get him interested in the water before he realizes neither Mom nor Dad can swim especially well.  If he doesn’t know he’s genetically challenged, maybe it won’t affect his psyche and he’ll just learn it. Carter’s been trying to help out around the house a lot, as well.  He likes bringing things to you - whether you need them or not. He’s also very glad to get reading time and very often will grab books and bring them to one of us.  It’s a great way for him to get 1-on-1 time with Betsy or me.  It’s tough being the big brother, so getting some personal time with mom or dad is a big deal right now. I’m sure it seems to him like one of us is constantly holding Bennett -- and not him.  Unfortunately he also seems to have realized that crying gets you attention - or at least it’s worked for Bennett, so he’s giving it a try, too.  Hopefully this is something which will pass soon. On the whole, he’s adapted remarkably well to a rather major change to the household.  I’m not sure if he’s still waiting for the day Bennett leaves or not (“He’s just a guest, right?”), but hopefully he’s resigned himself by now to having the extra body in the house permanently. In time, I am certain he’ll be glad to have him here.

Betsy’s been going with Bennett to “Baby and Me” class.  It’s a good way to be around other moms and their infants for a couple hours each week.  She’s commented how intensely the moms of first children are feeling everything - and it helps remind her how much of a gift Bennett is.  There will never be another just like him for us. I was just reminded of this. I just burped and calmed Bennett down a little.  I’ve determined what he needs to be comforted - generally - is to have me walk and bounce a little, get some gentle pats on the back, and to nuzzle up under my chin. This is his magic combination - no doubt not completely unique, but certainly different than his older brother. Looking at him just now I was reminded that his expressions are getting bigger -- eyes widening, mouth contorting, neck moving. He’s definitely starting to show his personality.

Special thanks at this 5-week point to Betsy’s mom.  She was with us for most of the first month and was a huge help - most notably with Carter in the mornings. Neither Betsy nor I are worth much in the morning, and Millie would take him daily for his morning walk - pointing out all his neighbors: dogs, trees, squirrels, the sky and such.  I think Carter’s grown more interested in words, since her visit.  He’s definitely offering more words these days (tree, doggie, car, eat, ball, beans, ...), mimicking what he hears (oh boy!), and attempting to repeat words when asked (Carter can you say “blue”?  “Boo.”).  Thanks one final time, Millie!